Once upon a time, on a beautiful, hot summer evening, a lovely but somewhat hot and sweaty lady was driving home after an exceptionally late day at work. She was feeling very good about having accomplished all that she had that day, and enjoying the near-perfect summer evening, was in high spirits. Her husband--a man she thought of often throughout her days, grateful for how lucky she was to have found him--was in class that night. On certain nights of the week, he goes to class straight from work, so they don't see each other until late.
Realizing that she didn't know what time to expect her wonderful bonus children the next morning, she sent a text to their mother, asking her what time she planned to drop them off.
Oh, yes, we should mention here that this lovely lady not only works full time, but is also a bonus mom and part-time caretaker for her husband's wonderful children. On certain days when her husband is working away to help support two households (theirs and his ex-wife's) and can't afford to take another day off to be with the kids he loves so much, lovely lady steps in and takes days off from her job to take care of them. I know what you're thinking, "Aw, that is sooo sweet and wonderful of her!" Most people do. (Well, except the ones poisoned by the ex with her twisted stories.)
But not only does she take days off to be with them, she's also very involved with every aspect of their upbringing while in their happy household. And--that's right kiddies, there's more--she does all she can to make the kids feel comfortable and able to talk about anything they want. She's even helped the kids pick out gifts for their mom (and paid for them, naturally, since the kids are too young to work). She's sent pictures of them to her; made copies of any paperwork that was only sent to one household; volunteered to take them whenever needed; shared extra-curricular activity information with her; and basically tried to establish a friendly, cooperative relationship with her.
Well, I'm sure you're thinking that this sounds lovely and you're sure that they now have a solid, happy relationship, since obviously both women only want what's best for the children - and to set a good example. Alas, you would be wrong. (I can hear the gasps now. I'll give you a moment to regain your composure.)
All right, let's settle down again.
This woman (in no way anywhere near as clever, witty or funny as the play whose title makes you think it's about her) refuses to acknowledge any kindness shown to her children by lovely lady. She, in fact, insists that Lovely Lady is "overstepping her bounds." We must wonder if that refers to all the money she spends on the children; all the time she spends playing with them, reading to them, helping them with their homework; all the days she takes off work to stay home with them; all the days she leaves early to pick them up from school; all the positive, supportive statements she makes whenever they bring up their mother; all the ways in which she tries to do her best to make sure they're happy, safe, comfortable, supported and feel loved. I suppose I see her point now. That is a lot of overstepping. Imagine someone completely unrelated to you caring that much about you - how rude!
And tonight's infringement?
Well, the text asked what time ex would drop off kiddos before she starts her day of...wait, what was it again she does? Work? Nope. School? Not at the moment. Volunteering with less fortunate people? Ha! Um, her day of...freeloading? Ahem. We move on.
Apparently it wouldn't have been ethical for her to answer directly. After all, ex is dealing with a rogue not-her-kid loving bonus mom who thinks she has the right to dare ask such a question of her. The insolence! She instead invited Lovely Lady to play the old telephone game, asking her to go to her husband who would then ask ex, who would readily reply, which husband would then convey to Lovely Lady. So much simpler than just texting back a number. (Single digit even, no a.m. necessary.) I know, I'm exhausted now just thinking about it.
So, how did the whole fiasco end? Poor husband was once again caught in the middle and ended up making a dreaded phone call to ex to try to reason with her, for a moment setting aside common sense. Needless to say, no reasoning was accomplished, as ex is extremely allergic to reason. She did manage to spout off her usual list of offenses committed by the couple against her - the overstepping of bounds and whatnot.
And while I wish there was a brilliant moral-of-the-story type of ending here, with lessons learned, tears shed and hugs all around, all I can promise you is that ex makes is abundantly clear that she will never try reason, understanding, compassion, letting go, or any of the secret ancient methods that have helped people get along for centuries. Those must be against her religion.
